Mario stands behind you, casually sprinkling salt over your head.

You: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

Mario: I'm-a SALTING you!

Get it? Assaulting? A-salting? No?

Holey (Muff) Diver

So how's everybody holding up?

I'm ... alright, all things considered. Kind of getting into a routine-that-isn't-a-routine. Like, at least I'm getting in more exercise now than I did when the world wasn't ending, so that's a plus, right?

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Would You Enter a Feghoot Contest For Money? Are You Dying to Judge a Feghoot Contest?

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Note to self: The next time that my writing happens to include griffon semen - I must make sure that I refer to it as "birdseed".

for example.
"Gideon the griffon smiled even as a final string of birdseed slowey dripped from the tip of his pecker onto the shag carpet"

You can use this tip, but you are going to have a bad time.

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